In our brains, the amygdala is the region responsible for processing emotions. When triggered by stressful events, it heightens our emotional responses and overrides our ability to think logically or reason clearly. This is why, when we feel angry or scared, we may experience physical symptoms like a flushed face, sweaty palms, or a racing heartbeat. In such moments, the amygdala has essentially taken control, a phenomenon often referred to as an amygdala hijack.

What is Amygdala Hijack?

In children, emotionally charged responses caused by amygdala hijack are often called meltdowns or temper tantrums. For instance, a two-year-old in the midst of a meltdown may scream, cry, and thrash on the floor, overwhelmed by emotions they cannot yet regulate.

Older Children and Stress

While meltdowns are more common in younger children due to their emotional immaturity, older children can also experience similar responses. Times of transition or stress—such as returning to school after a holiday—may feel overwhelming to a sensitive or anxious five-year-old, even if the situation seems minor to an adult.

Helping a child through a meltdown is challenging, especially if your own emotions start to rise. To respond effectively:

• Pause for a moment of calm
  • before reacting, try counting slowly to five or taking five deep breaths.
• Validate their emotions
  • reassure them that their feelings are understood, even if their behaviour is not acceptable.

Every situation is different, and how you handle a meltdown depends on factors like the child’s age, state of health, or whether they are hungry or tired. Here are some general tips:

Exhausted Young Children

Reasoning with a tired or overstimulated four-year-old is unlikely to help. Instead of engaging in lengthy explanations or trying to “win” an argument:

• Suggest calming activities like reading a story together with their favourite soft toy.
• Offer comfort in a quiet, soothing manner to help them regain a sense of safety and control.

Avoid Escalating the Situation

Arguing or insisting on being right will likely make the meltdown worse. Save explanations or discussions for a later time when the child is calmer and more receptive.

Helping children learn to manage their emotions is a gradual process. By staying calm and offering support during stressful moments, you teach them valuable skills for self-regulation and resilience.

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